Thoughts on Harry Potter will follow after a second viewing. Lisa is coming home today for Thanksgiving, and I'm gonna try and get her to go with me :)
Anywho, it was unseasonably warm 2 nights ago, and Brian decided the gutters could use a pre-winter cleaning. Woof. But I figured this is a husband's job, and hey! What are husbands for? Well cleaning the gutters, to be sure! So he brought out the big extension ladder, climbed up and told me he was going to clean from the roof. WHAAA?
"Yes," my beloved said. "From the roof." Apparently this is how he cleans the gutters at my in-laws' house. I had never heard of this technique before, and since I'm adverse to putting my loved ones in danger IN ANY WAY, PUT THAT SEAT BELT ON RIGHT NOW, I was a bit ... hesitant.
But up he went, as I steadied the ladder with all my might. He started climbing all over the roof, looking for a good (safe) place to start. Panicked, I circled the perimeter of the house, thinking of a contingency plan should his body come hurling to the ground.
I'll keep my phone in my pocket. Yes. Right here.
Then I'll call 911, obviously.
Then I'll try and remain calm and I won't move him because there could be a spinal injury.
And then I'll say 10 Hail Marys.
And then I'll stay very calm until the paramedics come.
Maybe I'll have to perform some sort of CPR. That's okay. I was a certified lifeguard. I got this.
Hi Sweetheart. Be safe. Can I throw you a helmet? Or elbow pads? Or rock climbing gear?
Then he peers over the side of the house, and tells me that the roof is too steep and he can't reach the gutters without toppling over. You know what I did?
Guess what I did?
I happen to love heights. It's true. A month before our wedding, I cleaned out my parents' gutters (with the help of Special K) like a CHAMP. So I suggested I climb up, clean as far as my arms and hands can reach while remaining on the ladder, climb down, scoot the ladder over a few feet, then repeat the process. Brilliant.
So I did it. And Brian steadied the ladder, and I scrambled up the ladder, mucked out the gutters and scrambled back down again until it was finished. It was actually a beautiful evening and a nice way to bond. Is this considered marital bonding? I think it should be.
So it was a nice team effort and I was proud of my domesticated, brave self. Except that climbing up and down a ladder at a steep incline, over and over when you are severely out of shape can only result in one thing.
Smutty Social Media, April 26, 2017
25 minutes ago